Rekindle Romance by Doing New Things Together
by Gloria Liven

The beginning of a relationship is marked with intense passions; the brain during young love resembles that of someone with obsessive-compulsive disorder, or addicted to drugs.
When this stage fades, couples in a long-term relationship might find their relationship more boring.
But research shows it's possible to add excitement and passion to a long-term relationship, by doing new things with your partner. Instead of going on a date once in awhile to the same old place, try something novel and new to help bring back the butterflies and excitement.

Arthur Aaron, a professor at State University of New York, has been researching this phenomenon on couples that have been married for a long time.

In one study, middle-aged couples were given questionnaires about the relationship and then assigned to three groups:
One group spent 90 minutes a week doing a familiar activity (such as going to dinner), the next spent 90 minutes a week doing an "exciting" activity that they don't normally do, and the last group was not assigned to do anything in particular.

After 10 weeks, the couples were given the questionnaire again. Those that had done exciting, new dates had a much greater increase in relationship satisfaction than the other groups.

Aron and his colleagues also did another study with married couples. One group was assigned the boring task of walking across a room together, while the other group was challenged to push a ball across a floor while crawling with their wrists and ankles tied together!

After the exercise, the couples that were challenged had a larger increase in love and satisfaction scores than the "boring" couple.

It's definitely possible to stay passionately and romantically in love; One study of couples that had been married for more than 10 years showed that their brains, when looking at their loved one, showed activity in the area of the brain that is associated with romantic love.

"You don't have to swing from the chandeliers," says anthropologist Helen Fisher, "Just go to a new part of a town, take a drive in the country or better yet, don't make plans, and see what happens to you."

"The more you invest in fun and friendship and being there for your partner, the happier the relationship will get over time," says Howard Markman. "The correlation between fun and marital happiness is high, and significant."

Couples that have fun together are the ones who end up staying together and having a good, enjoyable relationship. So think of something original to do, try a new sport; take a class together; go on a guided tour; take a vacation; drive to a town you've never been in before; or try any of these inexpensive and free date ideas. Or, try to be a little romantic with these free romance ideas; or sexy romance ideas! Maybe write your partner a love letter while you're at it.

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